The In-Between.

There’s a season in everyone’s life where they are waiting.

Waiting for their next big break.

Waiting for a new miracle. A fresh beginning.

Waiting for a future significant other to cross their paths. Or a friend to join their side.

Waiting for that letter – from a loved one or for acceptance.

Waiting for the inevitable whether good or bad.

For me, in this season, it’s waiting to join my husband in another state. It’s waiting to quit my job that I have been bruised and beaten in for four long years now. It’s waiting to leave a loving nanny family whom I adore. It’s waiting to leave my forever friends. It’s waiting and hoping for a new job to come along. It’s waiting to have my own place again. A home that fills my heart. We knew this was coming. It was no surprise to either of us, but only two weeks have past and it has felt like an eternity already.

It is in this in-between that I find the tears falling faster. They come and go without warning.

They fill my soul and ache my bones.

I feel as if I am left behind and forgotten. I feel as if life is moving on, but I am still stuck in the mundane with no wonder in sight.

It’s not the what ifs that scare me. It’s simply the in-between. It’s the waiting. I’m an extremely patient person when it comes to others, but when it’s regarding myself – that’s when things get difficult.

I don’t think the waiting will ever get easier. I don’t think something just flips and the mind is suddenly okay. I think it is done through tiny baby steps. A newborn doesn’t learn to crawl the day it is born. It takes time. It takes energy. It takes daily practice. And it takes patience.

The waiting game is going to be a process. Whatever you are going through. Whatever you are waiting for. I can’t promise that it will happen, but I can promise that the process will bring you patience. It will guide your heart and mind. There is always going to be an in-between, but it is in that in-between that we find rest. That we find hope. That we find joy in tomorrow.

It is in my tomorrows that I will find peace.

Peace in the everyday. Peace in the in-between.